The After Shock...

Sunday August 30 was one of the hardest days of my life. It seemed like I was crying every 10 minutes. I had to say goodbye (And watch my children say goodbye) to my husband for the next 6 1/2 months. Thankfully my amazing dad and step-mom flew in to stay with me and the boys. They were with us when we said goodbye and stayed for a few days after.

My heart broke to watch my husband run to catch his plane. At the same time I feel closer to him then ever. I've never seen him so emotional. He's a tough guy and he doesn't cry. That all changed the day he left. We hugged and kissed and cried together. I have a sense of peace that everything will be ok. I will just miss him terribly.

I also have to face the fact that I'm a single mom of 2 for a while. I have to run the house, bills, dr. appts etc... I know it will give me even more appreciation for when he returns.

The day he left I walked around in a fog. My head was fuzzy like I was sedated. It's a weird feeling to have. The next day was better. I still got emotional but not as much and my head was more clear. The following day I was "fuzzy" again and my vision was off. I had a hard time focusing. It's amazing what I bodies do when we feel emotional stress!

Today I took Dad and Dar back to the airport. I ran a bunch of errands and came home to put my toddler to bed for a nap. Aiden was in school and I was in a quiet house for the first time in a few weeks. Part of me wanted to take a nap, another part wanted to catch up on Facebook, another wanted to cry and then I finally called my neighbor to come over. She did and we chatted for 30-45 minutes until Aiden came home from school.

I think I've done well the past few days. I haven't had a nervous break-down or felt like I couldn't get out of bed. I was a single mom (of 1) before I married Jarod so I know what it's like. Also, Jarod's job in the military takes him away from home. All summer he was gone Monday through Friday. I'm pretty used to going to bed without him. Right now it feels like he's gone for his summer program and he'll be back Friday or Saturday. We'll see how it goes once the weekend rolls around.

My 7 year old seems to be taking it the hardest. He's been distracted and forgetful lately. He's not listening well in school and he's been crying about everything. There is a counselor at his school that will check on him every week. I am thinking about having him seeing an outside therapist also.

I am blown away by the amount of support that has been shown to me. I have a list a mile long of people I can contact if I need anything. I've gotten nearly 100 messages on Facebook and email from people I know or who know my parents and they heard about the deployment. So many people are praying for us and I can feel it. It feels like a warm blanket of support. I can feel God's Grace every day and it really makes me appreciate everyone and God even more.

I've been able to talk to Jarod via cell phone, email or webcam the past few days. I love technology!! He's in Hawaii for spin up training but will head to his deployment place in a few days. I've been advised to not go in to detail about where he'll be, when he'll be there, and what exactly he'll be doing. What I CAN say is that he is working with Special forces from all branches and they have a very important (top secret most of the time) mission in the Philippines.

Please continue to pray for Jarod's safety and for us back home. Pray for my continued peace of mind and for me to learn to adjust to my new, very busy, schedule. I don't want to overdo it and make myself ill but I do want to stay busy and have a regular schedule.

God Bless you all! Thank you again for your support!

I'll check in soon...
Love,
Linda